Darlings, I just got back from an almost three week hiatus! How did you possibly stand my absence for so long? I've been spending my time away keeping my namesake: eating next to nothing and drinking next to everything. And what better place to do that than Fire Island?
I spent the most glorious time in Cherry Grove with my dear friend Jack Aaronson. I did head over to the Pines for a bit, but it was full with a bunch of Ken dolls and the older men who buy Ken dolls. Being neither of the two, the Grove better suits my preferences.
I started each day with a screwdriver (you simply must have your Vitamin C!). I then hauled my beach chair and cooler down to the shore and sat under my rainbow umbrella. I have delicate skin, you see, so I can't exactly be in direct sunlight... ever. As I sipped on gin martinis (I have a special beach shaker), I yelled inappropriate things of a sexual nature to the boys walking around in their tight swimwear. It was truly glorious.
After doing this for 2-9 hours, I somehow stumbled down the boardwalk to the closest bar. At this point, I was out of gin, so I had to get my libations the old-fashioned way--showing my ass for cocktails. Around 2am or so, when I could barely see straight, I somehow always found myself in the infamous Meat Rack. What a magical place.
After 1-4 hours of sitting there under my rainbow umbrella and yelling now appropriate things of a sexual nature, I coerced one of the boys to carry me back to my house by promising them I would sit on their face. However, I never followed through. I'm a lady, after all.
Bren, I'm so upset that you missed it!
No comments:
Post a Comment